7 Things Successful People Do to Build Lasting Relationships

people-relationships

The single pattern that emerged among successful people is …

How much do relationships matter to you? We are talking all types of relationships, personal and business relationships.

Do you see your relationships directly affecting your life’s success or happiness or do you see them as a separate entity on their own, as a perk (or pest!) of life without serving a larger purpose?

Don’t worry. There is no right or wrong answer, and certainly no grading here. But there is a better way to live your life if you want to emulate successful people and what they always do in relationships.

Ever since I started this blog a few years ago, I’ve been studying successful people, people who are living life on their terms, achieving great meaningful goals, and appearing as wonderful human beings with many gifts and talents to this world.

Reminder: You can still grab The Positive Affirmations for Life program with more than 4 hours of audio affirmations for 7 life situations that impact your happiness and success the most, including the expanded relationships tracks.

It turns out that you can be a success no matter where you come from, what family or country you are born into, and what schooling (or lack thereof) you achieved. You can also be success doing just about any kind of work, in any field and industry, and under any economic or social conditions. And you can live out your success in many different colors and sounds.

But a single pattern kept emerging after studying dozens and dozens of successful people: The importance of their relationships – both personal and business – in their success.

The higher the success level of the person, the higher the importance of each relationship in his or her life, and the more time and energy went into the relationships.

The question is why are relationships so important to success

Why are relationships at the heart of successful people? Aren’t successful people busy enough as it is? And would they not want to relax and roll around in the lap of luxury when they are not working?

What we do know is that successful people are not big into wasting their time or squandering their wealth. They are smart, intelligent, and vigilant people who want to create even more success and happiness in their lives.

It turns out that among things successful people do, building relationships ranks high as a top use of their time and energy.

Now these are not just any relationships, but relationships that promote their state of wealth and health, success and happiness, self-development and personal growth, to name a few incentives.

Successful people want to create more success and thus, they hang out with people who push them to higher levels.

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I was very happy when I discovered this, because I Love Building Relationships. Now I had to focus on building lasting relationships with the right people.

7 things successful people do to build lasting relationships

So what are the 7 things that successful people always do to build lasting relationships? Note the use of the word “lasting”, and this makes sense, because successful people are too busy and too smart to waste their time so they focus on cultivating the types of relations that can stand the test of time, so that both parties can reap the benefits and the rewards.

1. State the objective of the relationship early on

This may sound business-like and serious, but in fact, it is such a relief to be able to build a relationship where you know the overall incentive behind it. Maybe you want to learn from each other.

Maybe you hope to do business together someday.

Maybe you want to be challenged or motivated.

Maybe you want to learn the business success lessons of one another.

Successful people are not shy to state the objective of the relationships that they plan to make lasting and neither should we!

Stating the reasons why you want to have a relationship is far better than not stating them at all or pretending they are something else altogether.

2. Communicate openly and clearly and listen intently

Listening and communicating well are the top traits of all successful people in general, but these elements come to play when you watch them in their relationships. They listen intently. They are present when they are with the other person. They are not too busy to listen and too quick to move on to the next thing.

Successful people also communicate openly, even if it means they need to ask for something or say no about something.

Open communication and intent listening are the foundations of lasting relationships.

3. Never wait until they need something to build a relationship

Successful people don’t “save” your relationship building energy — because they know that the energy does not run out. It grows by use, it expands and they use it well in building lots of relationships. They build these relationships well in advance of ever needing them.

So their motive is never colored by their own selfish desires to get “something out of the relationship” but rather, they go into each relationship with mutual benefits to both parties, and build lots of relationships.

Then when the time comes that they may have need of their relationship, they’ve already filled the trust fund and can “borrow” so to speak.

Don’t wait!” is the ultimate word of caution concerning relationships, and certainly don’t wait until you need a favor.

It’s like signing up for insurance after you lose your precious stone only to turn around and file a claim. Insurance companies, much as I dislike them, are not stupid and neither are people. You may very well get away with it — the favor, the insurance, or both — but know this, with this approach, you have not built a relationship, you have made a transaction.

4. Give generously at the start of a relationship. Give more throughout

Successful people don’t keep tabs on what’s in it for them and what favors they can collect on later, and this is especially true at the beginning of a relationship. Giving and giving a lot is the theme they use if they are building a lasting relationship.

This isn’t about advocating a selfless behavior — compassion and giving yes but selflessness, no – which means there is reward for the self when you give of yourself to others in a relationship first.

Giving means offering, as little or as much as you can, of your time, knowledge, expertise, energy, power or position in life, and watching it come back to you ten fold. Giving can be rewarding in itself. I know that in my mastermind group, I get more reward in giving to my team members than I do in receiving feedback for my own challenges from them. Funny how much you get by giving so focus on giving.

5. Speak up if something is not going well

I look back at so many friendships that went sour in my past, and it always comes down to nobody ever speaking up when things weren’t going well. We are afraid of saying anything and hurting someone’s feelings. Successful people don’t suffer from this.

When something is not going well in their relationships, successful people just speak up.

They speak up with integrity, with compassion and with kindness, but they still speak up and they do this early on so that the problems don’t fester. They do this not to make a fuss or complain, but to make the relationship better, stronger, and more mutually beneficial.

This is one of the more challenging things to do in a relationship so start on a smaller scale. This also tests your communication and listening skills, which is the second tip above. If you can get used to doing this well, you will have more rewarding lasting relationships in your life.

6. Fiercely support and protect their relationships

You know how you guard your jewelry? Well, successful people guard their relationships that well. They are protective of the people who have entrusted them with this lasting connection and they are careful how they leverage these relationships.

Basically, they don’t take their relationships lightly. Rather, they treat them like gold, like fortune, and that’s what lasting relationships can do for you in life.

Successful people always speak highly of the people in their relationships, they watch out for them, they guard their reputation, and they represent them to others as they’d want to be represented themselves.

They are simply protective and supportive as a big brother or sister would be to a younger sibling, and in turn, they get the same treatment from the people in those relationships. Everyone wins!

7. Work hard to mend, repair and strengthen a damaged relationship

Sometimes things happen, even to successful people. A miscommunication gets out. A ball gets dropped. A promise gets broken. And the relationship suffers a little.

Successful people are quick to bring focus and attention and care to a damaged relationship. They are not too proud to apologize and to offer to mend their ways. They are not too proud to work hard at regaining trust and rebuilding strength. They know that relationships are a long-term investment and an enabler for their aspirations and desires. They work hard at making things work again in their relationships, and hence make it even stronger than before.

So next time something goes awry in your relationship, think of it as an opportunity to get even closer and build even a stronger more authentic relationship.

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How to put the lessons from successful people into practice now

Remember, lasting relationships can strengthen your sense of purpose and happiness in life. Nurturing, strong, reliable and true relationships in life can be the difference between your own success – and lack of success. Plus, when you win, you get to celebrate within those wonderful relationships.

The instant joys of connecting with another human being aside, relationships empower you to achieve the unthinkable and the unimaginable. They push you higher and closer into the person you were meant to be, and when you are in the right relationship, others may have an even higher vision of life for you than you have for yourself. That level of faith and belief in your abilities can be huge help in achieving your dreams.

So focus on any of these 7 things successful people do to build lasting relationships, and implement only one at a time. Focus on your current relationships and apply these concepts in a measured way, and see if you notice a difference in the quality of your own relationships. I’m willing to bet that you will!

So build new relationships, renew old relationships and copy successful people to create your own lasting relationships.

Relationships-cd

Reminder: Grab The Positive Affirmations for Life program with more than 4 hours of audio affirmations on 7 life situations, including expanded tracks on building healthy relationships.

Oh and listen, if you’ve never put much stock into your relationships, don’t fret. You can start right now to improve the state of your current relationships and learn how to build the right new relationships. It is never too late to create positive change in your life.

How connected are you to your world and your environment?

The floor is yours: What type of relationships do you build? Why do you think relationships matter? Share your thoughts in the comments.

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Editor’s Note: A similar post was originally published in July 22nd, 2011 on Prolific Living. It has now been expanded, revamped, revised, and updated with fresh new content. Enjoy and spread the word!

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  • http://www.poweredbyintuition.com Angela Artemis

    Farnoosh,
    I think this is what I love about blogging – the connection to so many people. It’s kind of funny too that even though we rarely meet our blogging friends we immediately know, just as if it were an in person relationship, who we click with and who we don’t.

    Our lives would be so empty without friendships and human connection. There would be no one to share memories with either. Thank you for reminding me of this most important element in our lives.

    • http://prolificliving.com/blog Farnoosh

      Dear Angela, me too – something I never thought I could find through blogging but it’s there stronger than many other walks of life. And we missed you so much in Vegas because I knew that if I saw you, we’d already know one another, we are friends for life here in this space so real life is just another aspect we’d be filling in….Thanks Angela, and if you want me to cover any aspects of relationships in the series, just let me know. Lovely to see you here again, I’ve missed you!

      • http://positiveprovocations.com Zeenat{Positive Provocations}

        Hi Angela & Farnoosh,
        I agree with Angela completely! There is certain magic about blogging that gives us the opportunity to spark new bonds everyday. Many last longer and run deeper than any personal bonds…I feel its cause our thoughts meet first and then when we physically meet..its like meeting old friends who know us better than we sometimes know ourselves. I have happily invested beautiful energy in my online and offline relationships..and I so so love it.
        Relationships add *magic* to this life…
        You know Farnoosh, next weeks topic only blog is “how to make freinds everyday”… I will definitely link to this post in that. We are in sync girl!
        Love your thoughts and your heart. I consider myself truly truly lucky and blessed to have encountered you…who I very joyously and happily embrace as my friend/sister..and so much more. Thank you for being YOU!
        You do totally rock :)
        So Much Love,
        Z~

        • http://prolificliving.com/blog Farnoosh

          Dear Zeenat, when I get your comments here, I know I have hit the chord right again – you make me feel a thousand times more special than seconds before I read your answer…..Love how you articulate that our thoughts meet first – then if we are lucky we encounter one another in person – and needless to say, I love it terribly too – I am writing a guest post on why I love to blog and I think people like you – you yourself – are one of the many reasons and we are in sync. I am counting on reading that post soon – I may be a bit offline next week but you will hear from me on it and link away all you want, thank you for your comment, the Tweet, the link love but most of all for being in my life. The love and friendship is more than mutual, dearest!

      • http://www.poweredbyintuition.com Angela Artemis

        Farnoosh,
        Soon we shall meet face to face! I’m so looking forward to Blogworld NY!

  • Sandra Lee

    Hello Farnoosh,

    A beautiful and thought provoking post. I’m beginning to realize that relationships and connections mean far more to me than I had ever imagined. Thus I greatly appreciate your exploration of this topic.

    You said – “I define a relationship as the act of relating to another human being through a genuine conversation, a personal story, an eye contact, a listening ear, a laugh, an exchange of a shared feeling, or a hand of help.”

    This made me realize that relationship above all else requires being in the present moment – something many of us find challenging in these busy times when we are often preoccupied with our own thoughts.

    Thank you so much for this stimulating post, which dovetails so beautifully with my own recent reflections on virtual relationships. Thanks for your link generosity!

    • http://prolificliving.com/blog Farnoosh

      Dear Sandra, it’s funny how we thought along the same lines at the same time – I don’t think we can overestimate the value of relationships and connections even if we try! And I didn’t even realize what you said but it’s the one time I am truly present – when I am creating or renewing my relationships so maybe I meditate even more than I get credit for ;)! I am so glad you like this and if you think of specifics you want me to cover in the series, I am all ears. Thank you for sharing these lovely thoughts here!

  • http://www.timelessinformation.com Armen Shirvanian

    Greetings Farnoosh.

    I can say that relationships matter much because they almost guide what I do. A friend of mine will make a suggestion, and that will lead me to put in 3 hours of effort or head to exercise, and I would not have done either at that time had it not been for that relationship. Each relationship changes what I do. I’m not saying that others controls me, but they have a large impact on my actions.

    That Japanese way of doing business looks like it is way more efficient, as it weeds out most of those who are just looking to do a manipulative business transaction.

    I think I am more selective about the relationships I forge today than those I did in the past. I am not sure if this is good or bad, but it appears to be the case. I also can add that I try to relate to people on their level. Long ago I would try to get certain friends who weren’t interested in basketball to join the rest of my friends for basketball matches, but it took so much effort to go against people’s interests, so now I work with people the way they are. It is much easier to swim with the river than against it.

    • http://prolificliving.com/blog Farnoosh

      Armen, how nice of you to drop by! Yes it’s not about control but about the beautiful impact we have on others’ live and they on us. And being selective is wonderful – I think you are just being honest with who you are and if you pursue relationships only based on your shared interest in basketball, you will make great friends but you will limit yourself so maybe keep your world open to more people …. which may be just what you are doing as of late. Thanks dear Armen for coming by!

  • http://www.jungleoflife.com/ Lance

    Farnoosh,
    Relationships are so, so meaningful to me. And I would also say, that I had not fully realized that until I started blogging. That has taken my relationships (both online and offline) to an even deeper and more meaningful level.

    That connection with others – I truly believe it’s within us all. And the more we nurture this – the more we connect with others (in very authentic and real ways), the richer our life experience is.

    Being here, knowing you, and feeling your presence in my life…Farnoosh…know that this means the world to me. And it does, because I know how genuinely you treat the relationships and connections in your life. That is a gift…a wonderful gift that you give to each person you connect more deeply with. I’m honored to have experienced this with you…

    So, know that you are reaching into my soul today…and continuing to build upon something very wonderful that has already been created…a meaningful and real connection….

    • http://prolificliving.com/blog Farnoosh

      Lance, I just cannot match you in these beautiful words but I humbly take all the compliments – they are just too sweet to leave on the table! :)
      Blogging and networking have taken my relationships and my attitude toward relationships to a new level too – and the way we relate to others on a blog is a unique opportunity few other mediums provide! So so kind about all your sweet words and you know that I think the world of you too….*blush* and thank you dearest Lance….so much!!!

  • http://www.shakeoffthegrind.com Joe Wilner

    Farnoosh,

    Thanks for the wonderful words of wisdom. When it comes to any relationship, I think we must show respect and care for the other person. Showing we care provides the catalyst for that relationship to expand and develop further. No matter what professional or personal endeavor I engage in, I have begun to realize that the greatest impact I have on someone always comes after I show them respect and they feel like I care about them. If they see I really want them to better themselves, or learn something, or grow as a person, they are much more likely to open up and connect in a much more meaningful way.

    • http://prolificliving.com/blog Farnoosh

      Hi Joe, how nice to see you share your thoughts with us. Well, I can’t argue with respect. It is the one thing that Iranians emphasize in the act of engaging with others – The Western culture lends itself differently to respect but it’s still very much present and important, just not as emphasized so perhaps we can change the trends. Respect is imperative so I agree with all you say here and thank you for saying it!

  • http://zeroto60andbeyond.com Barbara Hammond

    Great post Farnoosh! I totally agree that relationship building is key to doing business of any kind. I spent many years in sales and can honestly say that I would not have been as successful as I was without developing relationships. It definitely continues today with blogging. Creating a trusting bond with readers is key to growing a blog. It’s life, just on a more ‘virtual’ level. All relationships are beneficial, whether positive or negative. It’s part of the learning experience we call life.
    Thanks for the post.

    • http://prolificliving.com/blog Farnoosh

      Dearest Barbara, thank you for the vote of confidence and proof from the business world – it never fails and if things go poorly in a transaction, the relationships always help pull things in the right direction. Blogging brings out our relationships on a different level altogether – and I am so grateful for every aspect! Thank you for sharing your thoughts, I can’t agree more and so happy you enjoyed the post!

  • http://www.alternaview.com Sibyl-alternaview

    Farnoosh: I loved this post and couldn’t agree more. I think that point you made about it the length of relationships mattering was such a good one. All relationships can be such amazing connections and once we realize that, we are less apt to take any of them for granted. It is so easy to fall into the trap of moving through your day on auto pilot and not really engaging or interacting with all the people you come into contact with. However, when you realize that every interaction has the ability to be an amazing and important one, you can always focus on bringing the right type of energy to every interaction. I think that is really life changing. As always…great post.

    • http://prolificliving.com/blog Farnoosh

      Dear Sibyl, I know you must yourself be amazing at relationships; I have a vibe and you can’t change my mind! :) Yes, avoiding auto pilot in all aspects of our lives is important but especially when it comes to the relationships!! Thank you for stopping by, sharing your thoughts and being a relationship that I am truly proud to have made!

  • http://www.thebridgemaker.com/living-beyond-your-skin/ Alex Blackwell

    Wonderful Farnoosh. This post is the perfect reminder that life is meant to be shared; and when it is, it is so much brighter and better.

    Alex

    • http://prolificliving.com/blog Farnoosh

      Dear Alex, you are very welcome and yes to the brighter and fuller life with our relationships – thank you for stopping by and for all your encouragement! Hope you come back for rest of the series!

  • http://10stepstofindingyourhappyplace.blogspot.com/ Galen Pearl

    I used to work in international business, especially in Asia. I was schooled early on about the expectation in Japan of knowing who you were doing business with. Someone shared with me a Japanese expression describing a person who has not come with a proper introduction. It means something like “a horse bone whose origin is unknown.”

    In Thailand there is an expression that is loosely translated as comfortable, but more that just physical comfort, it means a deeper comfort in the sense of emotional well being and spiritual ease. All encounters, including business encounters, are governed by the priority of establishing and maintaining this comfort.

    The lessons I learned doing business in Asia influenced me in my negotiations everywhere. More importantly, I learned that these are good guidelines for life. Paying attention to other people’s deep comfort and getting to know who they are will foster our genuine connection to those around us. Everyone, every single person, has something of deep heart worth to share with us.

    A Course in Miracles teaches that when we are connected to others, we are connected to God.

    • http://prolificliving.com/blog Farnoosh

      Dear Galen, welcome to prolific living! I am so grateful you took the time to share with us in detail your experience with Asian cultures, something that fascinates me. The expressions are hard to translate into English, I know because so much is lost in translation whenever I try to translate ANY Persian expressions for my husband – but thank you for doing so. Paying attention to others’ comfort and getting to know them….I love it. Thank you for all of your thoughts here and hope you come back for sharing more with us for the rest of the series!

  • http://uzma7.wordpress.com/ Uzma

    Such an important post Farnoosh. With a message I am just learning to imbibe. I’ve was a loner, even as a child. Am learning to share the journey(as I mentioned earlier), am learning to look at people with compassion only and not judgemental and barriers. Am learning, now like u said, the wonders this create. Thanks for a great post.

    • http://prolificliving.com/blog Farnoosh

      Hi dear Uzma, it is nice to hear how you are evolving as a person through life – being a loner has its ups and downs, its good and its not-so-good, I think. You are most welcome and let me know what other aspects to address in the rest of the series, thanks for your comment!

      • http://uzma7.wordpress.com/ Uzma

        Yup, its definitely good, and not so good, like you say. Talking of loners,or rather someone (lik e me)who enjoys ‘aloneness’ and finds social stuff cumbersome, maybe you could address that – building new relationships for those who like to sail solo. Am definitely enjoying making new friends, and I usually do what comes from the heart. Yet tips from you would be most appreciated. Thank you.Like Abubakar said, I think I will write on this too. Our last comment exchange on your last post is the inspiration, my friend.

        • http://prolificliving.com/blog Farnoosh

          Wonderful, great suggestions, Uzma. I may have to even include some help from others (hint hint) to better understand different personalities and how they each approach a relationship – As long as you are doing what comes from the heart, you really cannot go wrong. More to come in this space, thank you dear Uzma for the ideas and for your comments!

  • http://www.abubakarjamil.com Abubakar Jamil

    Great post as always. :)

    I’d like to share here a line I read somewhere and it says, “Only meeting a person by change makes it a lasting bond”

    I don’t know who said that, but since the day I read it, it has stayed with me and gripped me and made me think and I realized that it is strangely true.

    This whole synchronicity that happens all around us, especially so in the matters of relationships, shapes our lives in amazing ways.

    I think I need to write on this. ;)

    • http://prolificliving.com/blog Farnoosh

      Yes you need to write about this stuff, you’ve been very slack as a writer and I am starting to take issue with it ;)! Thanks Abubakar, but I honestly don’t get that quote in full – you have to explain it please. Does it mean a real meeting happens only if we change? Thanks!

      • http://www.abubakarjamil.com Abubakar Jamil

        I AM SORRY—A typo!

        Here is the proverb again: “Only meeting a person by CHANCE, makes it a lasting bond”.

        It’s actually an old proverb and I don’t know from which land EXACTLY.

        Hope it makes sense now. I was too sleepy last night I guess. :)

        lol, well you are not alone, I’m also starting to take issues with my not writing much these days. So I’m standing right by your side here as well. ;)

        • http://prolificliving.com/blog Farnoosh

          Thank you – that makes a lot more sense, Abubakar. And glad we agree on the writing aspects insofar as they concern you :)!

  • http://masafumimatsumoto.com Masa

    Hi Farnoosh, thanks for a great post. I liked the following part -

    “The length of a relationship is not a good measure of its depth or its meaning. Instead, remember the nature of your interaction with the other person, the simple exchange of your mutual understanding, and the lasting impressions you left behind. Let those mark your measures of success when it comes to relationships.”

    I agree with what you wrote here. I believe that relationships, especially great ones, last forever as long as I’m alive, because of those lasting impressions I had of people I met and interacted with. Those who let me create beautiful memories are like gifts to me.

    When it comes to interacting with people and especially listening to them, I believe having curiosity about them is important. (It seems to me the art of listening is somewhat lost, by the way?) What are their stories? What matters to them? What are their dreams? I tend to be curious about these things rather than conventional small talk questions. Actually, it helps me with keeping curiosity if I assume that people I interact with are all interesting people. That way, I can be open to possibilities. We all make assumptions consciously or unconsciously – so, why not actively make nice assumptions about people? I learnt this way of thinking from Mr. Satorialist when I met him at a meet&greet event and talked with him for a few minutes. Quite valuable a lesson.

    I’m looking forward to reading your blog posts and interacting with you, too. Let me know when you are in Tokyo next time!

    • http://prolificliving.com/blog Farnoosh

      My new friend from Tokyo, thank you – I am coming back to Tokyo next year. It’s been over 2 years and I miss it desperately!
      You hit on beautiful points in relationships and in perspective – Assumptions make us miss out on so much when interacting with others and it all happens through really listening and being curious and interested and sincere in the lives of other people, and in their pursuits and their fears and their doubts…granted, it’s not easy to get into those deep topics but it’s really not as hard as we make it out to be. I am so glad to have such a strong writer as a reader. Come back again anytime and thank you for your first comment on prolific living!

  • http://hanofharmony.com The Vizier

    Hi Farnoosh,

    This is a wonderful post! Relationships are so important in our lives. Our lives would be so empty without our family and friends. I totally agree that we should give genuinely and generously in relationships. But of course it should be within our means. And as you say, we will reap the benefits from our giving. Not that this should be our goal, but for those who appreciate what we do, it becomes a natural response.

    I believe that relationships matter and I love to forge strong bonds with people who are on the same wavelength as me. When my intuition suggests that a relationship is worth building, I go all out to form new friendships. Admittedly I am more reserved than you are when it comes to forging new friendships. But this is why I look forward to your relationship series to see what tips and advice you have to share.

    Thank you for sharing and starting this article on relationships! :)

    • http://prolificliving.com/blog Farnoosh

      The Vizier is back – and I just read your post on regrets, which was stunning. Your writing caliber is far above many others so I hope you continue to write, seriously and frequently. As for relationships I am in totally agreement with all you say here but I will add that the “same wavelength” doesn’t have to be present for me. It may for longer term, more serious relationships but I don’t make it a prerequisite or a requirement when I am interacting with the world around me, for a day, a week, a month….when I am passing through a city, when I am at a gathering, I expand every horizon and go beyond every boundary and through this, I have met fascinating people who on the surface were quite the opposite…Tell me what other topics to explore on this series too, and thanks for being here!

      • http://hanofharmony.com The Vizier

        Hi Farnoosh,

        Thank you so much for your glowing comments. I will continue to write seriously and frequently since I enjoy doing it.

        I suppose as an introvert, I would be interested in knowing how you make small talk and handle group interactions. These are things I am not very good at. :)

        • http://prolificliving.com/blog Farnoosh

          Noted!! Uzma wanted me to cover similar aspects of relationships so I may just ask you guys for some advice offline to better understand the challenge….thank you so much for the tip, The Vizier!!!

  • Gerhard Käppler

    Great post, Farnoosh! Relationships are important for a lot of reasons. For me one important reason is: You can and you should let people help you.
    I think we try way too often to solve problems for ourselves. We are shy to ask others or maybe we are sometimes just proud about our self-reliance. We don’t like to bother other people. We even don’t like to call our friends. We are weak and despaired sometimes but thinking we are not allowed to show our feelings. We prefer to brood and to ponder often without any result. –
    Only few days ago I turned on the radio and they played the old Billy Swan song “I can help”:

    If you got a problem, don’t care what it is
    If you need a hand, I can assure you this
    I can help, I got two strong arms
    I can help
    It would sure do me good, to do you good
    Let me help

    Most of the people are willing to help you. There are so many out there who can give you advice and can support you. You only need to ask them. You only need to be a friendly and considerate person. Nothing awkward at all. Just give it a try.

    • http://prolificliving.com/blog Farnoosh

      Hello dear Gerhard, welcome to prolific living and thank you for taking time to leave a comment. I love this – I love this great reminder which is very good. We can ask for help from our network and our relationships. And here you are singing a song to drive your point home – thank you so much for bringing up a point which can immensely ease our path to our goals. And I really hope to see you more for the rest of the series! I know you can help me think through even more aspects of relationships.

  • jonathanfigaro

    I’m young, but i think when it comes to relationships, its a give and get type of exchange. I give, you get, is just a balance, you give and I get.
    But it’s never that easy..it just sound good on paper. I know for sure if you work at it, it will work for you.

    • http://prolificliving.com/blog Farnoosh

      Hi Jonathan, welcome to prolific living – yes relationships are give and take but for me, the times when I really have an amazing relationship in the works is the ones where I have given more than taken … and as selfish as I am, I think it works – it balances out in the end and it builds up a strong foundation. Of course, in due time, I collect too. Just like the Godfather ;)!

  • http://SourcesOfInsight.com J.D. Meier

    Beautiful write up and I like your thoughts.

    My favorite relationships are the ones born from shared experiences. It makes nostalgia taste better and they are the Hallmarks of my life.

    • http://prolificliving.com/blog Farnoosh

      J.D., thank you – I love the phrase, so poetic and so true. Shared experience creates a special bond between us and others. Very apt and thank you for sharing!

  • Karen

    Hi Farnoosh,

    I think it’s great that you didn’t have to change the way you view relationships and were able to take advantage of this during your business life. It’s a really important distinction that many people do not make – you have to give and be available before you can get something back. People do not want to work with other people who they don’t know anything about. It’s just common nature to work with, help, support, think kindly of, forgive, etc people that we are in a relationship (or at least friendly with).

    Also, I think that if you don’t operate this way that your worldview becomes very small. It’s the people and the relationships that you have that enriches your life for the better.

    Karen

    • http://prolificliving.com/blog Farnoosh

      Hi Karen, it’s so nice to see you here again – yes I really didn’t have to adapt much to the Japanese way of doing business with relationships first – You do have to give at the beginning but in the process, you quickly learn who and what type of people you are dealing with. Thank you so much for weighing in and taking time to share your lovely thoughts here.

  • http://www.kaizenvision.com Aileen

    Farnoosh, your described a lovely and perfect way to measure the quality of a relationship:
    “The length of a relationship is not a good measure of its depth or its meaning. Instead, remember the nature of your interaction with the other person, the simple exchange of your mutual understanding, and the lasting impressions you left behind. Let those mark your measures of success when it comes to relationships.”

    I would love it to be common place, this measuring of quality – brilliant & so very, very true!

    • http://prolificliving.com/blog Farnoosh

      Aileen, sweet darling, so nice of you to stop here and tell me that you enjoyed it. So kind of you to leave these words. Thank you thank you! I know you know I enjoy our relationship immensely.

  • Rebekah

    I will not offend your (literally) beautifully honed appreciation for technology by saying anything like, “Oh, there are parts of this post I would print out and *underline,*” so I won’t :) But I could :)

    • http://prolificliving.com/blog Farnoosh

      Rebekah, you can try all you want but you will never be able to offend me, my dear friend. You are so cute and remind me of the days that I would myself print and underline and mark up everything that meant something valuable to me – thank you for making me smile and for showing up. Our relationship is very special – I enjoy it so much.

  • John Sherry

    A relation-ship is a ship that helps us chart the choppy waters of life as are friend-ships. They are the crew on our life journey whatever comes our way. What would we be without them? A beautiful homage here to relationships of all sorts Farnoosh; new, old, gold, long standing, freshly made, briefly touched, permanently empowering, full of love – relationships steer us and help make us. We all need each other and you have wonderfully shown how and why. My unconditional thanks for that.

    • http://prolificliving.com/blog Farnoosh

      Hi John, thank you so much for sharing these thoughts and the analogy – the ships sailing across choppy waters. I don’t think you can overestimated the importance of relationships and I am so happy you enjoyed this and I’d love your thoughts on the rest of the series also as I write it over time. Many thanks for stopping by here, John!

  • http://www.jessilicious.com Jess Webb (aka Jessilicious)

    Hi Farnoosh!

    Relationships are soo important to me, as well, and like others here have said, it is one of my favorite parts of blogging. In fact, it’s one of my favorite parts of being in business, period! I love interacting with and getting to know the different people I work with and come in contact with.

    And I just LOVE that the Internet allows me to meet people from all over the world, not just in my local town! :)

    • http://prolificliving.com/blog Farnoosh

      Jess, welcome to prolific living! How nice to see a new reader and especially on one of my favorite topics: relationships! I love to learn about others who bask in so much joy from connecting with people and yes, blogging empowers us greatly to do this. I must check your blog if only for the great name and play on words. Thanks so much for your comment, Jess!

  • Lizzie Manuel

    Hi, Farnoosh

    I think you truly show sincere importance on relationships. I admire how you patiently write replies on your post. I noticed that you never missed answering every comment in your blog even for just an ordinary person like me. (I’m not a blogger, just a reader and a fan of yours :) ) I appreciate how you try to communicate to every reader of this blog and try to establish a relationship. Even if I don’t know you personally, I feel like you connect with us, your readers. Thanks. You’re the best!

    • http://prolificliving.com/blog Farnoosh

      Dear Lizzie, thank you. That is awfully kind of you to say. Yes I just cannot miss out replying on all the comments especially when my readers took so much time to tell me their thoughts and feelings but it’s so much fun that I am happy to do it – even on vacation as in right now :)! And there is no difference to me who you may be so long as you take the time to talk to me and the community here, you shall hear back from me if only to thank you!! You really made my day here, dear Lizzie -thank you and please come back again!

  • Felicia

    Hi Farnoosh,
    This is a very interesting post you’ve written. Blogging is truly the essence of connecting with other people. Thanks for sharing!

    • http://prolificliving.com/blog Farnoosh

      Dear Felicia, I love seeing you (and your kitty cat!) here every time. I can’t agree with your words more. Here is hoping we always stay true to that essence. Thanks so much for sharing your thoughts!

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  • http://www.backgroundcheckmatter.com Aaron Fuller

    Personally, respect is the major factor of every good relationship. No matter who are you talking to, it won’t matter once you actually respect somebody. Building a good relationship too gives that feeling of worthiness in the world. Both of you have that willingness to listen and to talk to each other.

    • http://prolificliving.com/blog Farnoosh

      Hi dear Aaron, welcome to prolific living. Thanks for taking the time to share your thoughts on relationships! I love that you listed respect. It’s totally implied but it should be emphasized nonetheless. Thank you and hope to see you here again soon!

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  • http://lilzbear.wordpress.com Sadia

    Stumbled across your blog not too long ago. I love your writing style. It is well structured and quite proper, yet reading your posts seems like having a conversation with you over coffee…

    • http://prolificliving.com/blog Farnoosh

      Dear Sadia, I loved your blog’s tagline….and best of luck with Mommyhood (great Gravatar photo) and welcome to prolific living. Very happy to have you and very glad you enjoy my writing. It’s really nice to hear you say how it come across, thank you and see you you soon again!

  • Negar

    “…and some you can renew many years later because of that first exchange.” <– Oh, so true! :)

    I loved reading this post as one of my new years resolutions is to nurture my relationships! Again, you have inspired me! :)

    • http://prolificliving.com/blog Farnoosh

      Hi Negar,
      So perceptive of you to highlight just the one that applies to us as well as to other people in both our lives….
      That’s fantastic new year’s resolution and I hope our relationship is on that list too…..

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  • http://peterpaluska.com Peter Paluska

    Farnoosh,

    Good day! I have come to believe that relationships are the most important aspect of life that we have. Even when we are not with others, communicating, smiling, laughing, crying, debating, sharing, we feel the presence of others within us, in the form of voices, memories, conversations, and visions of future plans and meetings.

    This is a powerful post and one I feel very close to.
    Thank you for expressing it so beautifully!

    Best wishes,

    Peter

    • http://www.ProlificLiving.com Farnoosh

      Hey Peter, nice to see you here.
      Yep, relationships rank pretty high for me too; you are right about that – and I especially like the way you express it. Thanks so so much for reading this. And hope to see you here soon here.

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  • http://www.trafficgenerationcafe.com/ Ana | Traffic Generation

    I’ve always pictured you to be a social butterfly, Farnoosh – very easy to talk to.

    It’s amazing what we can gather (or presume) about each other just by staying in contact online, isn’t it?

    I, on the other hand, is a complete hermit and relationship building doesn’t come easy… That’s why I have an online business, I suppose – less human contact.

    Ana

    • http://www.ProlificLiving.com Farnoosh

      Ana, how lovely to see you here. Yes, a social butterfly, exactly ;))!
      I don’t know, I bet I could find a way for us to strike a very nice and long conversation, Ana. I just hope to have that chance. Relationships can take on so many layers and shapes and forms …. and you connect beautifully on your blog and your emails. Thanks for sharing these words here. Lovely of you!

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  • http://textyourexbackmichaelfiore.com Derek Blandford

    Hey Farnoosh,

    I think relationships are the glue that holds each and every one of us together. All of our lives take different paths, but no one gets anywhere in life without building relationships.

    It can be with your family. It can be with your friends. It can be with your neighbors, the gal at the local coffee stand, a complete stranger, or anyone, but every one of us needs to develop relationships throughout our lives.

    Some end up being good. Some end up being bad. But each and every one of them gives us a chance to learn something about our world and about ourselves.

    And because of that relationships are indispensable.

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  • http://www.prolificliving.com/blog Farnoosh

    Derek, they are the glue – very well put. And it can be beyond family and friends. I love that you emphasized that.

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  • http://patientambition.com/ Nick

    There’s some good information here, but when it comes to male/female romantic relationships, I wouldn’t follow this advice. Men and women communicate differently, trying to discuss things logically like two men would will suck all of the attraction out of the relationship. Women are as logical as men, but they prefer to communicate through emotions and actions. This is why men get so frustrated when they ask “what’s wrong? how can I fix it?” What’s wrong is usually that the man has stopped being masculine and/or he’s not appealing to a woman’s emotions and imagination through his behavior.

    • http://www.prolificliving.com/blog Farnoosh

      That’s some great stuff @disqus_tBqJ3SCb6e:disqus – I am no expert on romantic relationships although I enjoy a fabulous one with my true love/hubby and have for years. I can also see that my blog post wouldn’t apply directly to romance, and that’s not what I had in mind but didn’t specify. Thanks for the clarification and your thoughts here.

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  • http://girlgetyourrootsdone.com/ geturrootsdone

    This is some great advice! Communication and honesty are key.